Between the Wasteland and the Sky
by Kiasa
Summary: Sesshoumaru and Kagome were in a relationship but some things have gone very wrong and Sesshoumaru had to take Kagome back to her own era. What will he do without her? Will she be able to go on after being rejected twice? Read and find out! Warning-Angst
1. Sesshoumaru's Reason

The Reason

"I'm not a perfect person"

Kami knew he wasn't perfect. The blood of so many innocents rested

on his head. How many had he slain for his own gain, convincing himself it

was to protect his lands? He could lie to others but not to himself.

"As many things I wish I didn't do"

There was so much he regretted doing. How many nights had he lain

awake, wondering if he could ever be redeemed.

"But I continue learning"

She hadtaught him so much. She had stuck with him until his frozen heart

had finally melted. There was no way he could repay her.

"I never meant to do those things to you"

Why had he driven her away? He loved her. He was yokai enough to

admit that to himself. But why...

"And so I have to say before I go"

...why had he not been able to tell her? Maybe part of him still tried

to conceal his emotions behind that mask of nonchalance he had always

worn. She tried to change that but it was a hard lesson for him to learn.

"That I just want you to know"

He wanted so badly to tell her.

"I found a reason for me, to change who I used to be"

Whenever he was around her, he felt that maybe he could change.

"A reason to start over new"

He definitely wanted to start over. To... to build a new life with her.

He wanted to erase his past and build a future with her by his side.

"And the reason is you"

He knew what his reason was, but when would he be able to say it?

"I'm sorry that I hurt you"

Kami! He was so sorry! He had never meant to cause her pain of any

sort. How could he have been so blind?

"It's something I must live with everyday"

He had to live with the pain. Every second he felt the magnitude of

what he had done.

"And all the pain I put you through"

Now he knew that pain. She had spoken of it before. Now he knew. It

was like a thousand swords being driven into his heart.

"I wish that I could take it all away"

How he wished he could take back all the anguish he had caused her.

But there was no way. He had done what he thought needed to be done. He

should have realized to factor in his love for her. No, it wasn't carelessness.

He had honestly thought that he could live without her. He knew better now.

"And be the one who catches all your tears"

Tears...he had seen them in her eyes as he set her down outside the well-

house. He had heard them in her voice as she asked him why. And he had

felt them burn in the back in the back of his throat as he turned silently

away...leaving her with no answer.

"That's why I need you to hear"

Every fiber of his being wanted to tell her how he felt. He knew he

would suffer silently until he did...

"I've found a reason for me, to change who I used to be"

What had he been before her? An empty shell of a youkai. Before...

he thought he had no use for emotions.

"A reason to start over new"

He had become a new person. One capable of feelings...of love.

"And the reason is you"

He must tell her.

"I'm not a perfect person"

No, he wasn't perfect, but she had never expected him to be.

She...she had loved him anyway. No one but Rin had ever had that kind of

unconditional love for him.

"I never meant to do those things to you"

He had to make things right with her...before it was too late.

"And so I have to say before I go"

He couldn't hold back his feelings any longer. Her lesson had finally

sunk in.

"I've found a reason to show"

She would have no doubts.

"A side of me you didn't know"

He would finally let the whole world know how he felt...

"A reason for all that I do"

...the one thing he lived for...

"And the reason is you"


	2. AN

Okay, I am SOOOO sorry for this. It's not writers' block even though it was for a while. I found a song and I've started the next chapter....but (what can I say) I'm lazy. It will be done though. Sometime...soon...I guess. Thanks so much for waiting. The next chapter will be Kagome's POV.  
  
Ja Ne,  
Kiasa. 


	3. Iris

Disclaimer – Sobs. Fine, fine I don't own Inuyasha or anything in any way affiliated with Rumiko Takahashi. Sniff. Neither do I own any of these songs. They are all property of their respective owners.

Iris

"And I'd give up forever to touch you"

Flashback

His eyes were always so sad...like memories of ages alone with no one who cared...

"Cause I know that you'd feel me somehow"

She knew that she could reach him...I f only he would let her get near enough to him...

End Flashback

"You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be"

Flashback

As they lay together under the silken sheets she knew it was true...she had never known she could feel this way. Even what she had felt for Inuyasha was nothing compared to the love that filled her heart now.

"And I don't wanna go home right now"

She know she would have to go back to her own era for supplies soon, but she couldn't bear to leave him behind, not even for a moment.

End Flashback

"When all I can taste is this moment"

So many memories...to many...

"And all I can breathe is your life"

She couldn't escape them

"And sooner or later its over"

She would sleep she knew. The sleeping tablets she had been relying on so much lately would kick in soon and she could get away.

"I just don't wanna miss you tonight"

She didn't want to deal with the pain till then. That was why she did it.

"And I don't want the world to see me"

She had learned soon after she started to hide the scars. People noticed...

"Cause I don't think that they'd understand"

...and they asked questions. She made excuses because she knew how the "goths" were taunted and made fun of. She had done it herself until...

"When everything's made to broken"

She found the release it provided. When she cut nothing else seemed to exist or matter.

"I just want you to know who I am"

Sesshoumaru didn't know. She had always made sure that her scars looked like they could be the product of an accident. She couldn't bear lying to him about it, but she had had to. What if he had thought her weak and unworthy to be his mate? What if he had pushed her away? But he had ended up doing so anyway...

"And you cant fight the tears that ain't coming"

She felt the tears rise in her throat, but none came to her eyes. She had no tears left. Her eyes had dried up.

"Or the moment of truth in your lies"

That's all she had done since he had taken her through the well. Cried and slept. The moments in between she was stuck with her own thoughts. She tried to pretend that she didn't care. That she didn't love him.

"When everything feels like the movies"

It never felt real. It was like a tragic play where she was the main character who had been forsaken everything she had ever loved.

"Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive"

Those were the times when she cut. It made her feel human again

"And I don't want the world to see me"

What would he think if he could see her now, razor in hand and bare flesh before her.

"Cause I don't think that they'd understand"

She meant to go for her leg, but now she made a close inspection of the skin at her wrist. She knew it would take only one clean slice down each vein to be free of her pain.

"When everything's made to be broken"

She looked at his picture lying next to her on the bed. She grabbed it.

"I just want you to know who I am"

She looked at it closely as though waiting for him to come out of it and save her.

"I just want you to know who I am"

She kissed it gently. "I'll always love you," she whispered.

"I just want you to know who I am"

She felt the razor bite down once into each wrist. A single tear slid down her cheek as everything went dark.


	4. AN

Hey,

I am SOOO sorry I haven't updated lately, but I have a good reason. Two months ago I was put into foster care and I just started having access to a computer. Please bear with me. I'm doing the best I can to get this stuff up.

Jan ne,

Kiasa.


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